Be a Tree!

I am dead on my feet from carrying my weight (yeah, I know I am only small..) and I am swaying..I am swaying.. (yeah thanks, Rod). If only drama schools taught you to tap into stress, uncertainty, instability and the potential onset of early peri menopause, they would have got the perfect looking tree from me!

And the most important thing? I would have FELT it too! Swaying. Very unsteadily in the breeze. My arms too heavy for my small frame, my head flopping like the heaviest branch high up there (oh be quiet, I know I am 5 foot 2.. but stay with me ha ha) and my legs giving way. This is what a tree must feel like when it weathers a storm! So any new actors out there, if you are asked to be a tree...speak to those going through stress, instability and peri menopause and you will crack that tree! Ok, not crack it, because unlike Ben Ashton, most of us value trees and actually like trees. You know what I mean! They absorb carbon dioxide during photosynthesis. They are useful flood defences and help to prevent a river bursting its banks. Our moths, birds, butterlfies, bats etc feed off trees and hedges which helps them to breed anbd thrive..and they boost our mental and physical wellbeing in many ways. They keep us rich in oxygen, they filter pollutants, shade us in the heat and improve our immunity. AND, they help us regulate our hormones (the less said about those the better), strenghten our curculatory and nervous systems when we breathe them in. They offer us relief from anxiety and depression...and much more. You aren't here for science lesson (see Mr Smith and Mr Bond, I did pay attention..just not to physics because that is basically maths!) so we'll stop there. Although I will say that this Northern Hermia loves to be in the woods, looking up at the trees. It's my favourite place to be after the water. The smell of the earth and crunchy leaves as you walk among them is just everything. 

You'll remmeber me 'bobbin along, bobbin along...' well, I have news, I am now sailing. I am sailing, home again, cross the sea...to be free! It's a long journey and it won't happen over night but I should be among calmer waters within the next few weeks. Just in time for me to don my tights as Dick..yep, it's almost that time again!

But until now, take care readers. 

Love, A Real Nothern Hermia x

Montenegro Calling!

And, no, this isn't about Eurovision! 

From time to time..ok who (whom sounds too up it's self) am I kidding? Let's just say, regularly. Yep, that's it. I regularly have such random dreams... many are like film sets, though last night's was more like a comedy sketch! 

One of my close friends had gone to Montenegro by himself. I didn't know this until another close friend of mine, went too and also didn't tell me. I only found out after seeing photos, on her socials, of her floating in the sea in a large inflatable. 

I managed to get a cheap flight, and flew over there, by which time, my male close friend had flown home but my female friend had stayed (she is renowned for delaying her flights back when she is away...mind you, I don't blame her!). I joined her and we had such random times..including her saying, ''It's a pity so and so is married'' ( a lovely colleague). I was shocked and replied, ''Oh my God. I didn't know you fancied him!''. Her, ''Oh no. I just fancy a snog''! See, random!

On our return journey on the bus to the airport, another friend of mine was on his way home after also being in Montenegro! It's strange as neither he or my female friend a tan. It was me that was really bronzed! Hilarious for those who know me and refer to me as Casper (at least it's a friendly ghost. Could be worse!). 

The following week, I was stood outside The Lowry Theatre in Salford and Jack P Shepherd (yes, David in Corrie) came running out to greet me. He had a part time job there but had just returned from, yep you guessed it, Montenegro! His tan was dark..but then I saw it! A gooey patch at the top of his leg. It looked like treacle, but it smelt like gravy! You could actually peel it off!

A friend of mine says that it means that what is on the surface isn't real so to be aware when meeting new people. And that the people I know and love are genuine no matter what their outward persona... 

But I am choosing to believe that Montenegro is calling! 

Greetings wherever you are are,

A Real Northern Hermia x

Take Me For a Spin!

A spin. Verb-Turn or cause to turn or whirl around quickly. Noun- a brief trip in a vehicle for pleasure. Quick or brief. I am pretty sure that seven months shouldn't follow either of those words?! I mean, I love the waltzer because it spins quickly, but I love it because it doesn't last for long! And some people class their relationship as long term even if they have only been with the other person for six months!! Not exactly a spin, would you say? Then again, the U-haul thing can be common in the gay world! There's a saying  that I always loved..'here's me not able to find a matching sock, but there is she able to find her 'true match' every two months'! (sic).

If I was an alien, imagine that they definiately exist, I reckon I'd be too afraid to visit planet earth, that's for sure! Imagine looking down from above to see us all scurrying about. Scurrying..that could be another word for spin, could it? 

The other day, I recorded an audition for an animation about a dinosaur family. It was meant to be funny and ridiculous but to be honest, it wasn't that far fetched! Well, I don't think anyway. Ok, apart from the physical differences like I am not a 121 foot Patagotitan, I am a (real) Northern Hermia (short), but apart from that...! Mind you there are drawings of them by the sea, so maybe I am not that different after all! I am still bobbing around on the bottom (top) of the beautiful briny sea..the instability, housing wise, is still thus BUT my Dad has finally had the operation he had been waiting for for two years and my Father in Law no longer needs a heart operation because, apparently it has returned to normal! So that's two things.. will the third be a permanent home? And when will that come? 

Until then, 'I'm spinning around, move out of my way..'

Credit: bilimseldunya

Weird People Rock!

Dance it, dance it... 'Cause you're free

To do what you want to do

You've got to live your life

Do what you want to do

'Cause you're free...' If I sing it loud enough, will it suddenly be true?  

The other day, I shared a meme (I know, I know...) which said. "I have two moods. 1. Constant panic and worrying about every detail. 2. It is what it is". It made me chuckle. At that moment I had gone from completely stressing to "oh whatever"! The quote was from a page called 'Weird People Rock'. Is that relevant? Anyway, my head is racing round and round like a big Catherine Wheel on Bonfire Night. 

Since our landlady caused such an unstable living environment by not only increasing our rent hugely, but also by being unwilling to negotiate with us as anything less wasn't "tenable" (I know), I feel like I'm becoming more weird, (by society's standards) each day. This usually extroverted woman is becoming a little more introverted with each passing day. The fighting just to get what we should have, just to get some sort of home, the injustice of it, packing boxes with no idea of where they will be unpacked, is enough to throw anyone off balance..and when you add to that the shock illness and death of my Mother in Law, plus a father in law who is in and out of hospital and the fact that our landlady is unfairly, but legally by all accounts, expecting us the pay the extra rent for the time we have left (even though she has served us a Section 21 because we couldn't afford the huge increase) it's surely enough to make anyone want to run away..fast!?! 

As I sit in the early evening sun, and watch both teenagers and adults alike jumping into the quays (the canal), I can't help thinking that I've always prided myself on knowing myself quite well, and for the most part, liking myself too. I've always told those younger than me that once you get your twenties out of the way that you'll feel more comfortable in your own skin. Then, bang! Is this a passing thing? Will my brain suddenly reattach to the rest of me or will I be out at sea, sitting there, bobbing about on the rough British waters in the winter...or longer? 

People ok, friends, my wife, they often ask where my head is at when I start to chat and tell them my thoughts and concerns. Apparently they can be random to them, but to me, they make perfect sense! I was also saying to someone the other day that perhaps those of us who are neurodiverse are actually typical and those who are "neuro-typical" are the neurodiverse ones? One in seven people in the UK are said to be neurodiverse. That's quite high. Maybe we are the "normal" ones? Who decided what is typical in society and what isn't typical? Maybe it was some white middle aged wealthy man who said, "I'm great, be more like me. If you aren't like me, you aren't normal!" Whatever normal is and means, anyway! Why am I wondering if I'm more weird than usual? I mean, weird people Rock, don't they? Don't they? 

Until next time... Bobbing along

bobbing along on the bottom (top)

of the beautiful briny sea...

Love a Real Northern Hermia x

Halo by Name, Halo by Nature!

And if you believe that, you’ll believe anything!

I have got it into my head to make gluten free style Southern Fried Chicken. Mainly because my partner is obsessed with a certain high street takeaway and because I cannot eat it due to being (sadly) gluten free!

Let me explain. We have been watching a lot of Canadian series set on horse ranches and they always seem to be eating butter milk fried chicken. Then yesterday, we spent the day sorting their hoarding hoard as I call it, and in all of the clutter was an unused ‘Halo Health Fryer’.. Unsure whether it works, but I tested the electrics and its all go! So, guess what we will be eating tonight for tea? And yes, my readers, it is tea. I am The Real Northern Hermia so it is therefore: breakfast, dinner, tea, supper!

As I type this, we have thankfully said goodbye to Mayvember and hello to June! Finally we are able to socialise a little more and for the first time in 18 months, I saw my eldest niece a few days ago! It was brilliant. Surrounded by friends, she came with my sister and my younger niece and nephew to see me at a picnic! It was absolutely brilliant! Family time at last! They say that you learn something new every day, and as I paddled with my nine year old nephew, I learnt all the countries from the smallest to the largest across the world, the population sizes too!

Right, I must go to speak to the baby dinosaurs now!

Have a sunny week!

Love, a Real Northern Hermia! x